what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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