i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
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