I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
