Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
