she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
