Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
