Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize