if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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