Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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