You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
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