yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Randomize