Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
