I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
