I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
