I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
