Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
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