my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
