Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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