We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Me too!
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
