guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
My Higher Power is John Stamos
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
