If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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