just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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