seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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