i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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