just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Randomize
