I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
