He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
There are leaves in my underwear?
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