Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize
