I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize
