Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
