You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
