I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
