Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Randomize
