finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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