if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize