I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
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