Soap is not a condiment
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize