if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize