Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Just invented taco cereal.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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