he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
