Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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