can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
