I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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