like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
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