my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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