All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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