the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
