we're blogging at a bar
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize