Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
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