Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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