p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
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