do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I'm getting married
To pizza
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Randomize