i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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